“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1 ESV
The book of Proverbs was written by King Solomon. King Solomon, the son of David, made a request of God to increase his wisdom and God granted the request making Solomon one of the wisest people recorded in history.
Much of what Solomon records can be viewed as counter-cultural, that is, it goes against what society teaches us is acceptable and normal. For example, in American culture we’re taught to be self-reliant and chart our own course, while the wisdom of Proverbs states “…in an abundance of counselors there is safety.” (11:14) Society also encourages us to seek out the next best thing or “keep up with the Joneses,” while Proverbs shares that contentment and peace “give life to the body” and “ envy rots the bones.” (14:30)
In western culture, being assertive and demonstrating strength in speech is often viewed as a value-add. Whereas the wisdom of Proverbs asserts that softer answers diffuse situations and stronger language actually provokes anger. Consider this the next time you desire to give someone a piece of your mind, or when you feel like a volcano about to erupt because someone in your life is pushing all of your buttons repeatedly. While it can be tempting to give into our emotions and how we feel in the moment, I encourage you to take a breath and pause before responding.
Many of us do this well professionally, but struggle controlling our tongue with family members, loved ones, and even service personnel. Others of us do this well in our personal life, but professionally have a reputation of being a bulldozer! Wherever you may be in your journey, remember that soft responses, while counter-cultural will be the most productive.
Taking a breath before responding allows us the opportunity to pause and actually think about what it is we want to say and provides us a moment to be mindful of our tone and delivery. None of us will get this right every single time. The goal is to acknowledge that there’s room for growth and to be intentional about future interactions with the help of the Holy Spirit.
Reflection
In what ways, can I develop softer answers? Am I consistent in every area of my life? Are there certain triggers that provoke harsher words from me? What can I do in order to shift my responses to those around me in a way that will honor God?
Prayer
Lord, thank you for providing me with a road map of wisdom. Forgive me for being harsh in my responses to other members of your creation. Help me to pursue peace and speak softer answers, even in moments of frustration and hurt. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.
Photo by Anna Vander Stel on Unsplash
Comments